A Visit from the Grammar Nazi

I’m going to preface this post with some prior disclaimers I’ve made previously which allows me to let the Grammar Nazi come for a visit. First, I have been an editor and second, I have a BA in English.

Now, with that out of the way, I wish to address the phenomena of random capitalization. I’ve joined a paranormal forum recently and in my perusal of existing posts, I’ve found this female member suffers from Chronic Random Capitalization – or CRC. This is a recent post of hers regarding her birthday, which is apparently today.

“Today, I turned 32 years old.I watched the exact time roll in.Well, there goes Any chance I had of making my Birthday Cake. The Brownies I tried making went all over the Oven, so Everything is burnt up and overflowing.I Cannot do Anything Right! Yes, I am Beating the Crap out of myself for this screw up.My Baking should be Labeled a Felony Crime! Because every time I touch Anything, it gets RUINED! Now, because Everything went all over the Oven, I won’t be able to bake my Cake and my Hubby will be Angry with me for this.I should have just stayed in bed and Not touched Anything!”

I do not understand the purpose of random capitalization. Is it for emphasis rather than using bold or all caps? Or does this individual not understand the rules of capitalization? Either way, it’s startling to me to see random words capitalized. Oh, and just for the sake of argument, I don’t think there’s any kind of hidden code spelled out with the letters that are randomly capitalized.

And just as an aside, if you tell people your baking should be labeled a felony crime, that tells me that you have experienced previous baking failures. So one has to wonder why you would attempt to do something you’ve failed at previously when you know what the result will be.

And another thing… what do you put in a brownie mix to make them “go all over the oven”?? A bit of TNT? That sounds both scary and unappetizing.